Nefarious Love
by BeedleBard394
Summary: A Hermione/Draco Fanfiction - The battle is over. But not in Hermione's mind. She loves Ron with all her heart. But her heart doesn't only belong to him.
1. Returning to Hogwarts

_**Chapter One, Returning To Hogwarts.**_

''Wow,'' Hermione said, as she, Ron, and Harry walked into the great hall, ''It's... just like before.''

''Like nothing's changed.'' Harry said, gazing up at the now pale blue sky, as it swirled its way through the rafters of the hall.

''I wish,'' Ron piped up, walking slowly forward to stand next to Harry and Hermione. ''Don't even know why we bothered coming back; I mean we've done our fair share for the wizarding world, you know, saving it every year. We all deserve _O's_ in everything.''

Hermione spun round to face him, ''Oh Ronald,'' she said frowning, ''NEWT's are very important, and if you hope to get anywhere in the wizarding world, you'll need them. Regardless of whether you helped save it or not.''

''Oh here we go,'' Ron said, rolling his eyes and looking to Harry. ''Do you think maybe you could lay off, just for a few days?''

''No!'' Hermione shrieked, as she began rummaging in her bag, ''I would have expected you to take it a little more seriously after all that's happened, not use it as an excuse to slack off even more!''

''_Even more_? Cheers Hermione.'' Ron said glumly.

She gave him a reproachful look and continued to rummage in her bag.

''And I'll have you know I don't, _slack off,_'' he continued, ''I just find the work to easy, and I don't want you to feel... inferior.''

''_Inferior_?'' Hermione snapped, ''Of course, Ronald. What would we have done without you?''

''Guys, please. You're acting like an old married couple already!'' Harry said standing between them.

''Marriage?'' Hermione snapped, ''He'll be lucky to get that far!''

After giving Ron another scowl of disapproval, she pulled two pieces of paper from her bag, and handed it to them.

''Oh no,'' Ron said, taking one of the papers, ''These aren't timetables are they?''

''Yes! And they're a huge help if you don't remember.''

''Oh yeah I remember how helpful you were during our OWL's.''

''You'll thank me one day.'' Hermione said folding her arms.

''The exams aren't for months. Surely we don't need these now?'' Ron said.

''It's better to start early. Especially if you're looking to pass.''

They stood in silence for a moment. During the quiet, Harry's eyes scanned the timetable's empty squares. Ron's however were not on the timetable, but remained fixed on Hermione.

''What?'' she said; finally noticing his eyes on her.

''You've already started revising haven't you?'' Ron said.

''Well, of course. I'd like to make sure I know all I need to know before lessons start.''

''You already know everything! You don't need to know anything else! Surely?'' Ron said, staring at her in disbelief. Hermione's cheeks turned a bright pink.

''Well... You can never know _everything_.'' she said, with a small smile.

''Oh stop being modest.'' Ron said.

''Yeah, Hermione.'' Harry added, looking up from his timetable. Hermione smiled at them both.

''Come on,'' Harry said, ''Lets go up to the common room. I fancy a game of exploding snap.''

''Now?'' Ron said, frowning at him, ''Bit random.''

''We've been away from all this for so long. It's the little things you miss.'' Harry explained.

''Fair enough. I suppose it's never the wrong time for some snap,'' Ron said, smiling, ''Hermione?''

She looked up at them both, ''Hmm, I suppose a quick game wouldn't hurt.''

They walked slowly out of the great hall, and made their way to the Gryffindor Common room, right at the top of the Grand Staircase.

''Honestly, Ron, I don't know why you don't take this seriously,'' Hermione said while they stomped up the moving stairs, ''I just can't understand how...'' Hermione lost her words as she saw the blonde haired boy walking down the same staircase as them.

''Understand how I what?'' Ron asked as Malfoy walked passed him. Malfoy's eyes met Hermione's and didn't leave her until he passed.

''Oh,'' she said, coming out of her trance, ''Nothing.''

They came to the Fat Lady; she was talking with a friend from the second floor about what sounded like a very juicy peace of gossip.

''...and I asked her why, and she changed the subject!'' said the fat lady's friend, who was wearing a n umbrella like, pale blue gown, and sipping a small cup of tea.

''That's guilt for you! Oh... what do you three want?'' the fat lady asked, taking a sip of her tea.

''We'd like to get in, if you don't mind.'' Harry said sarcastically.

''Awfully rude, these youths, don't you think?'' the woman said with her nose in the air and her tea held with with only two fingers.

''Indeed, Gloria. Password?'' the Fat Lady asked.

''Erm, what was it?'' Harry asked Hermione.

''Bello Adeptus.'' Hermione replied.

''Indeed it is.'' the Fat Lady said, swinging open.

''Bello Adeptus? I swear those passwords are getting more and more random.'' Ron said, sitting on the squashy armchair by the fire.

''It means 'the war is won', Ron.'' Hermione said, sitting just next to him in a second armchair.

''Oh,'' Ron put his bag and timetable on the floor, ''So Harry... how about that exploding snap?''

''Yeah'' Harry replied smiling. He reached into his bag and pulled out a deck of cards. After setting them out on the table, they began to play.

Ron got 4 pairs; Harry only got 2.

''Blimey Harry, you've lost your touch.'' Ron said cheerfully, neatening his pile of matched cards.

''Yeah, I think I have. Hermione? You want a game?''

Hermione jumped and looked at him, ''What? Oh, no, not right now.'' she turned back to the window.

''Oh, okay. Ron?''

''No mate, I can't bare watching you loose again. It's painful.'' Ron replied, getting up. He walked over to Hermione and stood beside her, taking her hand, she didn't look at him, but continued to stare out of the window, ''Hermione? Are you okay?'' Ron asked, moving his head round so it was blocking her vision.

''Oh, yes, sorry. I must be tired.'' Hermione replied, looking back up into Ron's eyes. She stood up to face him, and he continued to hold her hand.

''Okay, well, maybe you should go to bed?'' Ron suggested, rubbing her arm with his free hand.

''Yeah, I think I will,'' Hermione replied, ''Bye Harry. I'll see you both tomorrow.'' she picked up her bag and turned to leave, letting go of Ron's hand.

''Oi,'' Ron said smiling. He pulled her back and kissed her, ''Cheer up, yeah?''

Hermione laughed weakly, ''Yeah. Bye.'' she turned and walked up the steps to the dormitory. She pushed on the door and walked in. A tear ran slowly down her cheek.


	2. The Library

**Chapter 2, The Library.**

''Where is she? She's usually first down in the morning. Plus it's our first day of lessons! I'm surprised she even slept!'' Ron said staring at the stairs leading to the girls dormitory. He looked over to Harry, ''What do you have today? I don't think we compared timetables,'' Ron pulled his timetable out and Harry, who was standing next to him, did as well.

''Double Divination,'' Harry grimaced at his time table, ''Fantastic.''

''Well, so do I. So at least we wont be on our own.''

''I suppose.'' Harry said taking another look at the two horrible words that would bore him for two hours.

''I wonder if... Hermione!''

Hermione had just hit the last step when Ron saw her. She looked very tired and not her usual cheerful self before morning lessons.

''Are you okay?'' Ron asked, his smile dimming slightly.

''Yes, I'm fine. Just couldn't sleep last night, that's all.'' Hermione replied with a croak in her voice.

''You weren't studying all night again were you? You know Hermione, it'll kill you one day. Your brain might explode!'' Ron laughed, he was clearly trying to lighten the mood Hermione had brought down with her.

''You should go.'' Hermione said moving some hair out of her eye.

''Aren't you coming?'' Ron asked, hoisting his bag further up his shoulder.

''No, I have a free period before Ancient Runes.''

''Oh,'' Ron's smile completely died, ''Well we'll see you later then, yeah?''

''Hmm?'' Hermione looked at him, clearly not fully listening, ''Oh, yeah, see you.''

Ron turned and began walking at the portrait hole; Harry nodded Hermione goodbye and followed.

Hermione stood and waited for a moment, before grabbing two books from the desk and heading for the portrait hole.

''Where are you going my dear, looking so glum?'' the Fat Lady asked as Hermione stepped through.

''The library, I have to return some books.'' Hermione replied almost, sounding almost emotionless; but that of course wasn't true; she was full of emotion. So much emotion it hurt.

She set off down the moving staircase at a fair pace and quickly came to the door to the library corridor. She pushed it open and started down the long hall towards the library.

Madam Pince was just outside talking to some first year Ravenclaws.

''...and that is what will happen if I catch you closing a book with such force again. They have feelings to you know! Now, off you go.'' she pointed them away down the corridor as Hermione approached.

''And how can I help you Ms Granger?'' Madam Pince said, adjusting her speckticles to see Hermione better.

''I'm just here to return some books.'' Hermione replied holding out the books.

''Well you know where they go.''

Hermione pulled her arm back and went to go around Madam Pince.

''But I must inform you,'' Madam Pince said before Hermione had fully gotten past her, ''Those books aren't due back for another 6 days. You've only had them a night, why are you bringing them back so soon?''

''Just... already read them. I need to find another one.'' Hermione said.

''Oh, well very well.''

Hermione turned and continued walking through the many bookshelves. The truth was, Hermione hadn't already read the books. She just needed something to do. She couldn't sit around for a hole hour with only her mind to keep her company. She had to avoid thinking about it. Perhaps it would disappear after she abandoned it.

She came to the Arithmancy section and slotted one of the books into the rectangular gap left in the solid wall of spines. She then turned and scanned the other shelves for the Potions section.

''Of course,'' she thought, ''It's right at the end.''

She set off down the walkway for a minute or two, and finally came to it. As she turned the corner into the section she saw him. Her hole body stopped and felt as tight as stone. She couldn't turn around and leave, she was trapped. Draco appeared to have been reading before Hermione had flown in. He turned his head to look at her, then returned to his book. Hermione stood stock still, unable to move.

''I think your book belongs there.'' Draco said in a calm voice, looking up at her again. Hermione hesitated, and then walked slowly to the shelf behind Draco. She slotted the book back into it's crevice. She took a deep breath and wondered whether to leave.

''How's Weaselby doing?'' Draco said still looking down at his book. Hermione said nothing. ''You two still love birds? Or have I left a lasting impression?'' Draco continued. Hermione still said nothing, but tears began to well up in her eyes. ''I suppose I didn't have to accept, but you practically begged for it-'' Hermione spun round, a few tears flying from her eyes.

''How dare you! How dare you even say that!'' Hermione hissed.

''What's the matter Granger? Didn't you like it?'' Draco said.

''I was comforting you!''

''Yeah, with your lips!'' Draco spat, a few tears ran down Hermione's face, ''Admit it, that's all you were after.''

''I can't believe you! I can't believe you would turn it around like this!'' Hermione yelled.

''I'm just trying to burst any little bubble you may have. I wouldn't want you getting the wrong idea or anything. Walking around thinking someone could actually _like you_!''

Tears streamed silently down Hermione's face.

''The only reason that Weasley is interested in you is because he has to take anything he can get!'' Draco closed the book in his hands, ''Although personally even if I was desperate I wouldn't go for you! I already feel ill after having to kiss you!''

Hermione knocked the book out of his hands.

''And do you think I enjoyed kissing you!'' she shrieked, more tears running down her face.

''You seemed to...'' Draco replied.

''Well I didn't see you objecting! I'll remember to stop caring next time! And let you sit on your own!''

''I wasn't on my own.''

''You've been thinking about your parents for weeks now! I've seen you, and the way you act! I just wanted to see if you were all right!''

Draco grunted, trying to seem un-bothered.

''I wont bother next time!'' Hermione said firmly, starting at the walkway, Draco moved in front of her.

''Stop trying to justify it! I was fine, and you know it! You were just desperate!'' Draco spat.

''I thought maybe you have a shred of humanity inside you after that night! I thought maybe you had changed for the better! But clearly you're still the twisted little bully you always were!''

Draco's smug smile dimmed.

''I don't know why I did it, and I wish I hadn't. It makes me feel horrible!''

''Well how do you think I feel! I had to kiss a Mudblood!'' Draco piped up.

''And how do you think I feel after kissing an intolerant, narcissistic, egotistical, vile boy like y-''

Draco shot his head down and held Hermione's thoughts with a tight kiss.

Hermione stood there, her eyes flaring at him, but he kept kissing her, it was silencing and soft, Hermione felt her thoughts drift away. After a moment she shut her eyes and guiltily let herself go, into his passionate lips. They seemed to say more than his voice. But no... she couldn't...what was she doing? What was she feeling? She hated every bone in his body, but with every second more she spend locked in his kiss she just couldn't let go. She couldn't do the right thing and say no.

She had to find the strength. How could she do this to Ron...Ron...she loved him and he loved her; how could she hurt him?

She pushed Draco away from her and broke the trance. Feeling began to spread through her body as she realised what she had done. New tears ran down her face. They felt cold against her skin. Malfoy didn't look her in the eyes, but continued to look at the floor, clearly shocked at his actions as well. Hermione hesitated, and with one last tearful look at Draco, she dashed passed him and down the walkway as fast as she could. Tears fell from eyes as she walked. With every step she hoped the feelings would be let behind, but they weren't, she knew what she felt back there, she knew how she felt about Draco, but she couldn't get tangled in his sick games...she couldn't hurt Ron. She dashed passed Madam Pince and down the corridor.

''Stupid...stupid!'' she thought, ''What's happening to me?''

She loved Ron. Everything he did she loved. Even when he annoyed her. She felt warm inside every time she thought about him, and she would always make her smile. This was a feeling Hermione had only ever felt for Ron. She hated Draco. He had never been nice, or shown her any form of positive attention. She couldn't understand how she could be feeling this way. She couldn't understand how it was possible to hate someone with all your mind, yet want them with all your heart.

''No.'' she thought, memories can be forgotten, and so can feelings. She wouldn't let this burn Ron or her, ever again...

No matter how raw she felt inside. No matter how her heart was split. No matter how hard she cried. She couldn't do it to him... and with one last look behind her at the long corridor, she opened the door and walked out, feeling more empty than ever.


End file.
